What Did He Just Say? 5 Awesome Subtitled Movies

Some of the best movies that I have seen in the last couple of years are what we in North America would call foreign films, (I guess if you live in the places that they were filmed you would just call them "movies", and call our movies foreign, but I live where I live, so I will call'em like I see'em). Now, this post almost could have

 been a rant, cause one of the things I hate is when people will not watch a movie just because it has subtitles, (one of my teen friends hates subtitles so much that he actually told me that Inglourious Basterds* was the worst movie he has ever seen**) and for me, if a film is in subtitles and you have a choice to watch the dubbed version, I always pick the subtitled version*** cause I like to hear the actors performances as they were meant to heard, even if I have to read what they are saying. So with that said, I am recommending five foreign movies from five different countries that are totally worth seeing.

So, first up is the brilliant film based on the true story of a young man who wants to become a photographer and get out from the....

City Of God (Brazil) is a film that has amazing acting and an incredible true story, all about a drug lord controlled slum in Brazil that ends up as a war zone between two groups, and "Rocket" is a young man who gets caught in the middle. City Of God is a movie that took me a long time to finally get around to watching, but after seeing it I can say it is an incredible worthwhile experience. There are interesting and memorable characters, the editing is incredibly well done and as always, it is great when films are based on true stories. Now a word of caution, it does have swearing and violence, so it is not for everybody and if you are easily offended then it is not the film for you.

Next up is one of the saddest and yet most beautiful animated movies ever made, which takes a child's perspective of the horrors of war, in......

Grave Of The Fireflies (Japan) is the story of a brother and sister who find themselves orphaned during the second world war, (this is the one movie of the five that I don't mind seeing without the subtitles, because it is animated it is not quite the same, although both the original language track and the english version are both done exceptionally well). Their Mother is killed during a bombing raid and their Father is out in the Japanese navy, leaving the siblings to be placed with an awful family relative, which causes them to leave and be on their own, living in caves and trying to make the best of it until their father comes home. Grave Of The Fireflies is a one of a kind movie that conveys incredible emotion through phenomenal animation, and telling a tale that is very unique amongst movies about war. It manages to entertain while pulling at your heartstrings and leaves you with an ending that is not really happy but more realistic. On a whole this is a great example of the unseen horrors of war, sibling love, and how far family will go to take care of each other.

From looking at World War 2 through the eyes of children, we move to looking at it from the perspective of the Norwegian underground resistance, that was trying to desperately get Hitler's goons out of their country, and one "mad"**** man named Max who led the way.

Max Manus: Man-O-War (Norway) is a movie I came across at the library when it was mistakenly put in the wrong section, and I am really glad that someone misplaced it, cause it is a great unique war movie. It tells the story of Max Manus, a leader in the Norwegian underground resistance against the nazis, (I hate frickin' nazis, did I ever tell you that) who have taken over the country. It is filmed really well, has very believable action and has a decent pace. And it too has the whole "based on a true story" thing going for it. Plus, how great is the name Max Manus, it just screams, "I AM AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!", so it has that going for it as well.

After two movies about WW2 lets move on to the only movie I have ever seen about the Korean War made from the Korean perspective, in the very violent.....

Tae Guk Gi: The Brotherhood Of War (Korea, duh!) is the story of two brothers who are forced into the army when their neighbors to the north declared war on the south. The one is incredibly smart, and the other one is incredibly loving and only wants whats best for his family, and he thinks that means his brother should become a doctor and is willing to do anything to get him out of the fighting and back to their mother and family. It has solid acting and action, and is very original in its storytelling, although it is not for the faint at heart as there is a fair amount of graphic bloodshed, but it is a war film after all, so think of it this way, if you can handle Saving Private Ryan, then you should have no problem with this.

Last up is a movie about one of the most important and best martial artist to have ever lived, the quiet and unassuming.....

Ip Man***** (China) has to be one of the best martial arts movies I have ever seen. Donnie Yen, (the guy who plays Ip Man for those of you who don't know who Donnie Yen is) is amazing, with fists so fast that sometimes you would swear they had sped the film up, (they didn't, if you can believe Wiki that is, and if you can't trust Wiki then what can you trust******) the story is great, (basing the story on a real person always bla bla bla, you should know the deal by now), it is beautifully filmed, the acting is solid all around and the fight scenes are just simply amazing. Oh, and did I forget to mention, that Ip Man was another famous marital artists first master, now what was his name again, oh yeah, BRUCE "I AM THE DRAGON" LEE!!!!! So yeah, Ip Man rocks on so many levels that it hurts just thinking about it, and the fact that more people haven't seen this just cause it is not in english is maddening.

So there you are, five movies that although you will have to do some reading to enjoy, are well worth the effort, (that is unless you are illiterate, and in that case just sit back and enjoy the cinematography, but come to think of it, if you got this far in my blog and you are illiterate, you haven't understood a word I have typed, so I will just say enjoy the pretty pictures, and pretend you got it). So give foreign films with English subtitles a chance, you never know what you are missing until you give it a try, and for all my illiterate readers, I will end with a funny picture of a monkey for making it this far, and remember everybody, hands up and chin down is good, chin up hands down will make you sleepy real fast. Until next time, Blog at you later.

*Hey, I actually spelt it right, which is to say, it is spelt incorrectly if you are using the proper words, but Q.T. spelt it wrong on purpose, now, I know I spelt it right/wrong cause when I bought it on Blu-ray it came with a dog tag that now shares space around my neck with a Jesus dog tag, and if not for that I would have spelt it wrong, or right, or something, my head hurts now either way.
**I actually think it was the best movie of 2009, so my friend Connor basically couldn't be more wrong.
***Animated movies are one category this fits in, but the best example is the Japanese Godzilla movies, which become so much cooler when you watch the dubbed version, like the following video will show.

****

*****Big shout out my friend Jim Chen for telling me about Ip Man and then giving me it as a birthday present, thanks Jim, this picture is for you.

******

Pixar Smackdown: Round Four

When I first thought of calling these posts Pixar Smackdown, I never thought that one of the movies that I think is amongst Pixars best would be smuck downed so hard, and by a little cute fish no less, but that is what happened, because the winner of round three was...

Yep, Nemo totally trashed* Wall*e in the biggest vote landslide to date, (it was 6 to 2 incase you were wondering, wow, that is so, underwhealming). This is the first time that the movie that I picked actually lost. Now before anyone starts ranting at me in their heads, (or out loud for yous** people who are really into this for some reason) I will say this, I think Finding Nemo is an incredible movie, but I just think that Wall*e is better, mainly due to the... well, I think I will just use my friend Ben Peltz's answer for picking Wall*e, "Its scope and its cultural commentary is massive for what is billed as a kids' movie." and I total agree with Ben on this, (Ben also has an awesomely smart blog on Google+, click the link and check it out, after you finish this of course), but the rest of you voted for the clown fish and company instead, so that is that.

Ok, now that that is out of the way, onto round 4. First up is my second favorite animated movie of all time***, which is about the daily lives of superheros, and their friends and families. Of course I am talking about...

The Incredibles is, well, an incredible movie, for lack of a better word. It is funny, has great action and a realistic depiction of what

 could happen to a "Super" once they can no longer be super. Add to that the great voice work and direction from Brad Bird and a little fashion designer saying, "No CAPES!" and you have one...(I am trying not to say incredible, but I really want to) amazing movie, but can it possibly compete with a "precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics", well thats up to you, cause it is going up against......

Who knew that race cars and tow trucks could be so entertaining, but they are. Cars is often over looked among its Pixar brethren,

 cause, well, lets face it, it has cars that are humans, but are,......cars. Some people have trouble with this, I am not one of them. I for one think Cars is great. It is funny, has one of the most memorable Pixar characters in Mater, (I totally knew that Larry The Cable guy would make a great tow truck the second I heard my first Git R Done) and made a whole lot more fans for nascar. It also looks fantastic and has a great moral about thinking of others before yourself.

So there are your choices, superheros or automobiles. Now, for a friendly reminder.

                    We here at Jesus Was A Browncoat So I Aim To Misbehave,

                     (which is really just me, but it sounds cooler if I say it that way,

                     cause you might envision a room filled with really awesome yet

                        overweight funny mega geeks that are working around the clock

                        to serve your humor blogging needs.****) are looking to crown

                        the best Pixar movie ever, so when voting, please don't just vote

                        for your favorite, pick the better made movie, and to make sure

                         your vote counts, you have to place it in the poll on the right side

                   of the page. Thank you for your patronage and participation.

So get voting everybody, and if you are in Ontario, Canada, today this goes doubly for you, because it is election day here, (and you should see some of the parties that are out there that you can vote for. There is one that has their main goal as legalizing marijuana, I think they are called the Happy party, or was it the Munchies party, I can't remember, but I am pretty sure they would be really funny to watch if they ever got in*****) So until next time, remember, your left shoe goes on your left foot, and don't be tricked into thinking otherwise, or you'll just end up walking in circles, and no one wants that, so keep both shoes on the right feet, (I mean, correct feet), and you will be able to stay on the straight and narrow. Until next time, blog at you later.

Possible foreshadowing? Who knows?

*I did two awesome things there, first, I used some great "T" alliteration, which is always nice, and secondly I said Wall*e got trashed, which might actually be a use of irony, but I can't be sure of that, cause irony is a tricky thing to get right, especially if you are a female canadian pop singer, but that is another story.
**Yeah, I meant to say yous, so stop correcting me in your head already.
***Incase you are wondering what the number one is, you can find it that answer in my Best Movies Of All Times List.
****That would kinda make me the Steve Jobs of the operation, which I only bring up because I do all my writing for this thing on my iPad, and Steve Jobs passed away today, so although I never met you Steve, from the bottom of my heart I want to say thank you for all you did, rest in peace.
*****Sorry, but its never gonna happen.

Half The Force, Still The Same Price: A Fullscreen Movie Rant

It doesn't seem that long ago that I was in the cashier line at Best Buy with the newly released Star Wars Trilogy DVD in my hand, (I am talking about the real Star Wars trilogy here, not that fake piece of "dirty word" that Lucas tried to pawn off on us a while back) you know, the cool silver one that looks like this.

Well, as I was standing there, waiting, I noticed that the lady in front of me had a Star Wars trilogy in her hand that was gold instead of silver, and then I noticed that the silver ones were widescreen and the gold ones were fullscreen. Now, at this point I leaned forward and politely asked her if she didn't actually like seeing the whole movie, (Ok, I didn't really say that, I actually just shook my head and wondered if she knew what she was buying, but I said it in my head, so that is good enough) and that brings me to a nice little walk down memory lane.

You see, loving Star Wars as I do, my parents bought me this really cool collector set with all the movies on VHS, (VHS refers to video tapes, these were like ancient dvd technology, for those of you young people who might be reading and didn't understand the reference) and for the first time ever I was introduced to, WIDESCREEN movies*. Now at first I didn't get it, the picture seemed wrong, squished kinda, but it was explained to me that when you watch a fullscreen movie, you are actually missing some of the picture**, and that widescreen lets you see it all. Here are some pictures comparing the two so you can see what I mean, first with Star Wars




Sorry its a little blurry, the internets not perfect you know, but you get the point.

 And then with an even better example from Lord Of The Rings 

So you got to see the whole picture, that was cool, but what about those annoying bars you might say, they are just so......annoying! Well, thats kinda what It thought at first too, but then it was explained to me that you are supposed to watch the movie in the dark, and the bars won't bother you. And you know what, its true. So, this was all before dvd's came out, and when they finally did, most of the time they came in widescreen, but if not you usually had the option to either watch it in widescreen or fullscreen, and on the same disc no less, (although some of them used Double Sided Discs to accomplish this, and that is a whole other rant all together)

So here is my question?

Why the heck are they still putting movies in fullscreen!!!!!!?

I mean, what is the point? If they could fit both formats on dvd's before, why not now? Plus pretty much every dvd player I have ever seen has the ability to zoom in, which basically gives you an

option to make any widescreen movie into a fullscreen movie, (that is assuming you like missing the complete movie experience). So why do they still make full "frickin' annoying missing the scope that was intended" screen movies? So, if you know, feel free to let me in on the secret, cause it bugs the crap out of me, especially when you accidentally pick up a movie that you have been looking for and buy it, take it home and unwrap it to find that it is fullscreen, (this happened to me on more then one occasion, stupid rabbits, fullscreen is for....., well, schmucks). So, that is my rant, until next time, remember, stay safe, stay warm, and for the love of Pete, (hey, thats me) stay widescreen. Blog at you later.

*It helps to put a deep loud movie announcer voice in your head for that part, but if you want a less epic post, feel free to just read it in your own normal pedestrian voice.
**What they do is actually called Pan And Scan, which means that when they go to put the movie on dvd, someone actually has to sit there and watch it and decide what the most important part of each film section is, and then focus on that, leaving everything else in limbo like some half eaten taco that you ate and then put down, and your mom put it in the back of the fridge, and you find it years later. Now, what ever you do, no matter how much you like tacos, do not eat that one, sometimes, if you love something, you just have to let it go, this, is one of those times. Unless of course you are watching the widescreen version of the movie, which is like eating the complete taco and going back for seconds, and even thirds possibly***. So to recap, fullscreen is two year old moldy half eaten taco, Widescreen is taco paradise, and now you know.

***Man, now I really want a taco, and I am writing this at work at 1:35 in the morning, this sucks.

Pixar Smackdown: Round Three

Welcome back to the third round of: Pixar Smackdown!!!

Just to recap for those of you who have not been playing along at home, in round one Monsters Inc. defeated Toy Story, and now for the results from round two, where A Bug's Life went up against Ratatouille. And the winner is.....

Yep, A Bugs Life won by a whopping 4 votes to 2, (the voter turn out is starting to remind me of a local government run election) so yay for the insects I guess. So now, onto round three, which as far as I can see, is going to be one of the toughest, cause it has two of the biggest Pixar movies going toe to toe. So first up is the movie that caused pet stores all across the world to sell out of clown fish, of course I am talking about.

Finding Nemo has to be one of the most beautifully animated

movies of all time. Water has never looked better, plus all the fish and coral, they just did a stunning job.

Now take that and add all the incredible voice work and an endearing father son story, and lots of memorable humor, and what you get is a freakin masterpiece. But can that masterpiece beat another of Pixars masterpieces which has possibly the sweetest animated character ever.

Yep, I think Wall*e is one of the most endearing characters ever to be put on screen. There is just something innocent and likable about him, the way he loves so fully.

If you have ever read my Christ In Film post you will know that I basically think that the character of Wall*e is awesome on many levels, and the film is the same. The story is just great, it is very original, creative and heart warming, looks incredible and even has a great moral message about taking care of the environment and obesity.

So, there is the hard choice before you, and remember, it is the better movie I am looking for, not your favorite, and make sure to vote on the pole on the side, its the most thrilling thing you can do on the internet, plus it helps lowers your cholesterol*. So until next time, stay loosey goosey, and I will hit you on the flip side, or the middle, or somewhere other than in this post. Blog at you later.

*There is no actual proof that voting on my question of the week will lower your cholesterol, but its the internet, and anything could happen, so give it a shot and see what happens.

Biking, Baseball And Joseph Gordon-Levitt: 4 Movies Worth Checking Out

A while ago my friend "Bear"* asked for some movie suggestions, so this is the first of many posts that will let you all in on some movies that are not quite as well known as say, Harry Potter, or

Avatar, but are pretty awesome in their own right none the less. So to start I thought I would give you two sports movies and two movies with one of the best young actors in the business, Joseph Gordon-Levitt. So first up is the true story, (Actually, they are both based on true stories, sweet) of a crazy Scot who challenged the cycling world authorities, (who are jerks, big fat jerks, well, ok, due to the fact that I am trying to lose weight I won't say they are big fat jerks, cause they seemed to be thin enough, but they are still jerks none the less) and changed the sport forever. I am talking about,

Flying Scotsman Trailer by clr16

Yeah, The Flying Scotsman is terrific, I remember seeing a trailer for it but then it disappeared out of theaters fast, as many of the really good movies do. Anyway, The Flying Scotsman is a very good movie about a man who is trying to overcome depression and

 disappointment to become the best cyclist in the world. The acting is quite good from the whole cast with Jonny Lee Miller, Billy Boyd, (minus the hairy feet**) and Brian Cox all putting in great performances, and it does a great job of letting you feel the movement of riding a bike incredibly fast, even one made with washing machine parts. So check out The Flying Scotsman, if you are looking for an inspiring movie or just really like weird shaped bikes. Next up is a movie about a small town that eats, sleeps and breaths baseball, (my buddy Joel would have loved growing up in this place) and they also play it a bunch too, well, at least they did before they had The Final Season.

The Final Season is a well put together small town small budget baseball movie that is predictable yet still good. It is fairly clean, family friendly and has a decent cast. Again as with the first movie, it is based on a true story, has a good message and oh, and it also has Rachael Leigh Cook, who looks really cute in a baseball hat. So if you likea da baseball, and you likea da movies, then you will probably like The Final Season.

Now, onto the awesomeness of Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

Now you may know JGL, (thats whats all his friends call him***, and since I have seen so many of his movies it's like we are practically brothers, so he is cool with me using it) from such movies as Angels In The Outfield, 500 Days Of Summer and the best movie of 2010, Inception, (where he was awesome) but JGL is an incredibly hard working actor, and has been in a lot films, and not all of them get the attention they deserve. So to start, do yourself a favor and keep a "LOOKOUT"**** for the movie Brick.

Brick is a fairly unique movie in that it is a teenage film noir that would have made Bogart***** proud, (for those of you who don't know what Film Noir is I stole the following description from Wiki

 for you, "Film noir is a cinematic term used primarily to describe stylish Hollywood crime dramas, particularly those that emphasize cynical attitudes and sexual motivations.", for those of you who already knew that, pat yourself on the back, cause you are in the know) it has good solid acting, interesting dialog that although seems very unrealistic, works amazingly well for some reason and a well put together mystery. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is great as the lead, looking for answers about his ex-girlfriends murder among the elite of the high school culture, taking a lot of punishment along the way. This movie is not for everyone, some will find it too slow or too self involved, but for me, it works pretty much perfectly, and it might work for you too.

To finish up I leave you with another Joseph Gordon-Levitt movie that rocks and doesn't get enough love, The Lookout.

Just like The Flying Scotsman, this is a movie that I remember seeing trailers for and then it seemed to just never come out, so when I finally got a chance to see it I was bummed, cause it rocked, and hardly anybody saw it. Jeff Daniels and Joseph Gordon-Levitt are great together, bickering back and forth, and then you get a cool mystery and heist kinda all thrown in there. JGL gives a stellar performance as he tries to keep his mind straight while being stuck with an injury that fights him at every turn, (it is a little bit like Memento, which is another awesome movie in its own right), and it has a very satisfying ending.

So there you go, four movies that deserve to be seen that you might have missed. Feel free to let me know what you think if you end up watching them, or are ultra cool and have seen them already, that would of course mean you would have to comment, which seems most people don't want to do, (with a few exceptions, you guys that do read and comment, you know who you are, and thank you very much for taking the time to give me your thoughts, what ever they may be). So until next time, stay safe, stay in school, and stay away from the KFC Double Stacker, it is pure evil******. Blog at you later.

*I named him that, cause I tend to give people nick names when it suits them, like my friend Stretch, who got named cause she is tall and thin, but also has the last name Armstrong, and there was an awesome toy from my youth called Stretch Armstrong, so it just fits her perfectly, boy am I awesome.
**He played a Hobbit incase you didn't get the follicle foot reference.
***I just made that up, I have no clue what his friends call him.
****Ha, JGL movie title joke, don't worry if you have no clue what I am talking about, I do, and that is all that matters.
*****Bogart is a reference to one of the coolest actors in movie history, Humphrey Bogart, who did a bunch of film noir movies, and it makes me very sad if you didn't know that.

******That is unless KFC wants to sponsor me, in which case it is the best thing ever! Yeah, I can be bought, at least in matters concerning fast food chicken.

Wands Or Lightsabers: May The Force Or Patronus Be With You!

So this weeks question is incredibly simple, with no big long explanations, (I actually asked my best friend and his beautiful wife this question and they answered in unison in about half a second*) so here it is.

Would you rather be a Wizard from the Harry Potter movies?

OR

Would you rather be a Jedi from the Star Wars movies?

There you have it, you all know what this entails for both choices, and if it sways your argument, yes you do get a wand if your a Wizard and a light saber if your a Jedi.

I have posted a poll at the side incase you just want to vote, but feel free to leave a really cool answer if you are up for it. So get answering, and until next time, stay good, no matter you be a magic or force user, and I will blog at you later.

*Just incase you were wondering, they both picked Jedi, and once I told them they would get light sabers it left no doubt to their choice.

Pixar Smackdown: Round Two

In the first round of Pixar Smackdown, Toy Story went up against Monsters Inc. and it all came down to one vote. And the winner is........

Yep, Sully and Mike Wazowski won, receiving 5 votes to Buzz and Woody's 4, which means that only 9 votes were cast in total, which is really sad, but no matter, now we move on to the next round, and hopefully you might feel guilty enough to actually take the 3 seconds to click your choice on the right hand side. Now, onto this weeks Smackdown.

First up in Round 2 is Pixar's second film, about a dreamer that just wants to make life better for himself and those around him, and because he is different minded then, well... everybody, is often shunned for it. Of course I am talking about Flick, the wacky ant in, A Bug's Life.

Now quite often, when I end up talking to people about Pixar movies, I hear it said that A Bug's Life is their least favorite. Now saying this, people don't say it is a bad movie, but just it is at the

 bottom of the list of Pixar movies. Now I for one do not feel this way. I have always had a soft spot for A Bug's Life. I think it has excellent voice work with Foley, Leary and Pierce all giving great and fun performances. It also has a kinda of Seven Samurai feel, (incase you have never seen Akira Kurosawa Seven Samurai or don't have a clue what I am talking about, feel free to click this link for the trailer once you have finished reading this post and voted) which makes it all the better. So since many find this to be the least of all Pixar movies, I decided that it should go up against the Pixar movie that I personally feel is their weakest, which is...

Yep, Ratatouille. Now I know some of you are probably shocked, cause a lot of people loved Ratatouille, but I didn't. Now, I am not saying it is a bad movie, in fact, I think it is a very good movie, but as far as I am concerned it is the least best of Pixar's efforts. Saying that, rats have never looked so good, or cute, and I really

liked the way that food and cooking is viewed, and as with most Pixar movies, it has a great message about following your dreams, and looks amazing. Now like I said, you may feel differently about which one you like better, and I will repeat, this whole Smackdown thing is not about picking your favorite Pixar movie, but the best. So, which is the better movie, A Bug's Life, or Ratatouille. Again as with last time, feel free to give an answer in the comment section, but in order for your vote to count you have to put it in the poll on the right hand side of the page. It will remain open until Round 3 is up, so get voting, and remember, only vote once, or Jesus will unleash a bunch of ants riding rats to chase you around your living room, and you don't want that. So until next time, stay lemon fresh, and blog at you later.

*Did you catch the pun that Sully makes in the picture, if you did your really smart, cause I didn't even mean to do it.